Day 73 – 300 Steps to Greatness


I got such tremendous response from my post yesterday via email, phone calls, chats, tweets, etc. I decided to repost “Superficial People”, which I originally wrote in November, 2009.  The reminder is for me as well, because as I continue to strive towards greatness, I need to regularly keep tabs on the people I allow to enter into my life.

Oh, but, first:

In case you missed it, I had an AWESOME interview with the real “Hitch”, Dating Doctor – David Coleman!  He gave INSIGHT that single, married and dating people can really use.  I know he opened my eyes – I always learn so much when we speak. You can download or listen to the episode here:

Superficial People

I know a lot of people.

Superficial people, why do we let them hang around?

We all  have them.

Hanger-oners!  (That is SO not a word, but, I bet you know what it means!)


Fake as can be.

Always smiling in your face, when you turn around, their smile is soon erased.

Why do we let me hang around?

I think for some of us, at some point in our lives, the negative validates us.

I think for some of us, we are so accustomed to negativity, that it conflicts with the positive.

But, if you want better, you must CHOOSE better.

That means we might need to get rid of the Superficial People in our lives.

Sometimes, in order for God to enlarge our territory, we need to tighten our circle.

My favorite lyrics from this song is:  You think you and me are cool, that’s cause I know how to play you!  Hello, goodbye, I won’t even let you try to run your game down on me.

There are a few people that I have known since the start of my career.  They were there from the beginning and are still with me.

There are others I met along the way, and have been around for a reason or even a season.

Having been in the entertainment industry for half of my life, starting in the music industry many years ago, I quickly learned not to call everyone a friend.

And I must admit, I wasn’t always such a good friend.

One truth remains…

I like people I can feel.

So, if we ever interact or meet face to face, keep it real.

Don’t ever be superficial, as I won’t EVER be superficial with you.

If you have an ulterior motive, just SAY IT.

Then I can say yes or no and we can move past it.

Over ten years ago, I met a young woman in a recording studio.

She was a vocalist and shopping her television show to a local cable network.

We spoke briefly on a few occasions.

Over the years we lost touch.

Last Saturday, I attended Robert Townsend’s Ultimate Pitch Class in NY.

As we introduced ourselves in front of the attendees, I noticed one person in particular.  Her name sounded familiar.

Afterwards we spoke at length and exchanged cards.

As often happens at events like that, I got overwhelmed with names, so the faces and names all blended in.

However, I always e-mail or text the folks I meet, to open the lines of communication.

Imagine my surprise when I received a response e-mail which said “I met you several years ago at the studio.”


We were engaged in face to face conversation and didn’t realize it.

Guess what?

She had been trying to contact me for some time.  Not because I was in television, she didn’t even know that.

She wanted to reach me because she always heard good things about me and my work.

She’s a television producer now and had a show on the BETJ network!

Who KNEW that years later, we would BOTH be in the television industry?

What if either of us had been Superficial People?

Don’t close the door to opportunities by pretending to be something you are not.

If it’s meant to happen – it will!


3 thoughts on “Day 73 – 300 Steps to Greatness

  1. Another yet AMAZING post! I feel that this is alesson we all can learn. I know that we have all been guilty of establishing relationships for personal gain, but then again some relationships are established by fait for a purpose to expand ones gifts. “Your gifts will make room for you”. I guess the motive of the heart is what matters, and you name says it all. “Suncere” If we are sincere in what we do good will come out of it. Again, I thank you for your insight, your post, and the ability to be in your cyber world of relationships.


  2. ANOTHER great blog Suncera!
    It’s so much to be said about this blog that I wouldn’t even know where to start as I sit here with a ton of “I could tell you some stories” storming through my head right now like a tornado.
    In short, I say, my experience has taught me not to wait around long enough (and especially) allow someone else to-without adhering to what my spirit tells me when it comes to people.
    If I feel it (I could be wrong) so I bring to you.
    I do not have time to find out later or by surprise.
    I hate surprises-even the good kind.
    I feel that I’m always gratuitous, thankful, grateful and surprised-by all things; large or small, because I love to be “though of” on any level-at ANY time, because I too, am that kind of person.

    Especially considering what you’ve accomplished, I can only imagine the collection of stories you have about superficial people-that is always unfortunate.

    As well, in my lifetime, I’ve collected pain from the same and the remedy I came up with was getting rid of words like “my best (so-in-so).” Every “best” friend has done me in or one way or another. I’m afraid of that word.
    I figure, if we are “best” ANYTHING, we know this.
    If I am best ANYTHING to you-you know this, I show this.
    If you are best ANYTHING to me-I know this, you show this.
    We share, we tend to, and we take the time to care.

    With anyone whom I give ANY amount of my time to-I expect your best and I give my best in return.
    If I fall short, I expect to be told, because I have no problem doing the same.
    My solution? We let time, communication, our commonalities, even our differences as well as the relationship itself handle the rest.
    I figure: keep it real, stay true, communicate, we’ll BE each others best.
    I hold dear, this saying: “You are my friend if you are: protective of my feelings-(vehemently), guard my failures (fiercely) and celebrate my success (with me).”


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