My life has been consumed with trying to balance my responsibilities as a mom to a teenage son and being a freelance writer. No day is the same and it’s been quite hectic, to say the least. In fact, I’ve recently had a hard time when asked the question “so when do you have time for fun?”
I’m now on a blitz that will last the next five days to push a new show for VH-1, and while in the midst of thinking of how much audio editing, writing, editing and formatting I need to do today, I realized today is day 50! 50 days!
One thing that I have done consistently over the 50 days, give or take three or four days is to blog. I’ve achieved the goal of making blogging a lifestyle for me. When I wake up in the morning, my FIRST thought is I NEED to write something. Even when I’ve tried “taking a day off”, I find myself writing. Having a guest blogger every Monday actually helps me focus on getting my other writing done.
This morning, while reflecting on what I need to accomplish today, I took some time to meditate on what I’ve accomplished so far. Not physical accomplishments. Emotional and spiritual accomplishments.
Things that can’t be measured by money or checked off on a list, because, quite frankly, we tend not to measure how much we mature or progress emotionally.
We measure tangible things.
However, without that growth, without stretching ourselves, we will not be motivated to accomplish those things that are measurable, those things that are on our checklist.
I went back to an old post, as I’ve done often in the past week or so. When I wrote this, I was healing from the loss of my mother. And although there are some days that I miss her more than words can say, despite our complicated past, I was actually speaking through pain.
Today as I read the post, it doesn’t feel the same. I read it with new eyes, with new maturity and with more life experience and I can see growth. Imagine that.
Imagine Me (Originally posted November 16, 2009)
“Imagine me, loving what I see”.
I didn’t think I was pretty.
I didn’t think I was good enough.
I didn’t think I was talented.
I didn’t think I could write.
And I sure didn’t think that people would want to read what I wrote.
I was born to a heroin addicted dad and an alcoholic mom.
I saw my dad three times in my life. The third was in the morgue as I went to identify his body, ravaged form AIDS acquired from a dirty needle.
My mom died from breast cancer two years ago, and although she was freed from the demons of alcoholism many years ago – she took up another addiction which distanced us – religion.
“Over what my momma said and healed from what my daddy did.”
Imagine me, tweeting every morning messages of inspiration, words of encouragement.
“Being strong and not letting people break me down.”
I started this blog for all of you, who think that you are not good enough, who have ANY insecurities. Because I know what it’s like to have a burning desire to do something so great – something you feel destined to do,
But, you don’t feel good enough.
You don’t feel strong enough.
I tweet every morning for you.
Let me be the voice of God whispering in your ear.
Let go of the past, it’s all gone.
Imagine me, struggling with years of insecurity and now being healed enough to share those struggles with you.
Imagine me, and know that I am more like you than you realize.
It is my hope that you will enjoy this blog and find something that will motivate, encourage and inspire you or someone in your life.
READ. COMMENT. SHARE.
And if you’re not already following me on twitter @thatwritingchic follow me, and I will follow you back – cause I’ve got your back!